Things Christians Don't Say

If you have been on Facebook this week you may have seen various humourous “Things XXXXXX Don’t Say” pages popping up, probably as students try to procrastinate from exam studying. And because we know everyone loves a good Christian parody to jump on the bandwagon, we at All4God have set up “Things Christians Don’t Say“.

The whole point of these pages is that most of the statements made are either ones that the group in question technically shouldn’t say but in reality do or things that they don’t say but really should be able to. Here are some of our examples of Things Christians Don’t Say:

  • I don’t find the Air1 playlist repetitive. In fact I wish they played my favourite songs more, I hardly ever hear them.
  • I can totally spell Habakkuk without having to look it up
  • I watch Friday Night Lights purely because they go to church a lot, not because of Tim Riggins/Lyla Garrity
  • I go to the evening service as I prefer the worship there, not because it allows me a long Sunday morning lie-in
  • The sermon was an hour long and I didn’t check twitter once during it
  • I went to a Christian college purely for the quality of teaching with no thoughts of getting a Ring By Spring

For more be sure to “Like” Things Christians Don’t Say on facebook, where it is rapidly becoming the latest viral sensation (and then tell all your friends so it gets more popular and then you can later brag to them about liking it from the very start…)

QUESTION: What are your suggestions of “Things Christians Don’t Say”?

Learn more the author of this post:

Pete McM

The original founder of All4God, Pete is 26, lives in Northern Ireland, is a junior doctor, Ulster fan and is passionate about Jesus