Top Christian Chat-up lines

Valentine’s Day is rapidly approaching, and I thought about marking that with a few serious articles about relationships and all that banter. But I figured that would be too predictable, and so instead plan on doing something about being single (if it was good enough for Paul…) But before that I thought I’d do what I can to give those of you who have found yourself in the unfortunate position of being single in the run-up to Valentine’s Day a bit of help if you wanted to be able to change your relationship status while roses are still being sold at an extortionate price. And so I present a list of top Christian chat-up lines.
These are all chat-up lines with some sort of Biblical or Christian culture reference, designed to help you show that Christian member of the opposite sex that you’ve had your eye on that not only are you able to deploy a witty chat-up line, but that you are also prepared to make your faith central to all aspects of your life. I have tested some of them out (purely in the interests of research of course…) and got some reasonably positive results back. But don’t take my word for it, try them yourself!
So here for you to use when needed is the All4God list of top Christian chat-up lines:

• Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives… Because he never met you.
• How about you and me do Song of Songs – the remix?
• Every time I read Philippians 4:8 I think of you.
• How would you like to join my Purpose Driven Life?
• The Bible says ‘Give drink to those who are thirsty, and feed the hungry’ – how about dinner?
• What do you think Paul meant when he said, “Greet one another with a holy kiss.”?
• I can be your Boaz.
• What’s your name and number so I can add you to my “prayer” list?
• Do you believe in predestination or is my attraction to you free will?
• If these were the days of Noah, then how about you, me … pair?
• Mark Driscoll and John Piper sermons make up the bulk of my MP3 collection
• Is this the transfiguration, because you are glowing?
• Hi, my name’s Will. God’s Will for you.
• Are you cold? {pause while person says yes} Ecclesiastes 4:11
• I prayed and fasted for three days and God told me it was time to ask you out.
• I would bring your father twelve-hundred Philistine foreskins for just one date with you
• Hey, I would work 7 years for your sister – but I would work 7 more years for you.
• Want to take a ride in my Zondervan?

And for those of you who find yourself on the unwanted receiving end of any these, here are some putdown lines you can use turn them down. (I’m listing less of these because I hope there will be less need for them, especially if I’m ever using any of the chat-up lines again!):

• God loves me, and has a plan to prosper me and not harm me. So I don’t think you’re part of it.
• My love for you is just agape.
• I’m not sure our callings are compatible.
• You would make me stumble.

NB Disclaimer – I didn’t make these up, I merely came across them on my journey through the interweb, and in some cases refined them. Most of these came from the ‘I appreciate Christian pick-up lines’ group on Facebook – look it up if you are on Facebook!
If you try any of these out, let us know how it goes. And if you have any other favourite Christian chat-up lines, please do share through the comments!